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Yom Kippur Reflections
Another
deep time of the Jewish New Year and Yom Kippur has come to be. I love
the time of Yom Kippur. (I like to spell it as "Yum Kippur" because
although it is a time of fasting, it is paradoxically a time of feasting
for the soul.)
Yom Kippur is also known at the Day of Atonement in which there is
reflection and contemplation on the various ways one has been "off the
mark" in relation to everything and everyone in one;s life from
relationship with oneself (one's thoughts, actions and judgments) to
relationship with community and everything in between. It is a time of
prayer, fasting, contemplation, atoning, asking for forgiveness and
re-aligning oneself.
Every year I find myself turning deep inside. Not only do I love
attending temple services, but I also like to reflect on where and how
in my life -- with myself and others -- am I not in "right"
relationship. I ask myself what hurts and "injustices" am I still
holding onto and not forgiving? What ways am I out of integrity with
myself? How do I fall short of living what I want all human beings to
live -- reverence for all of life, awareness of our Oneness and
compassion in action? These questions are broad and bring me to
reflecting on every area of my life, from my own patterns of self-care,
how I am spending my time and if this is in alignment with what matters
most to me. I contemplate all my relationships and I let go more,
forgive more and allow love more. It is a time for brutal honesty with
myself in all areas of my life -- in order to cleanse, to live more
consciously and lovingly and to be a clearer channel for acts of
service. It is a time for me to check in with every relationship in my
life. Nothing is outside of review and re-adjustments.
There is a Sanskrit word, called "dharma", meaning the path of right
action. To be in alignment with soul purpose, action, thought and heart.
Yom Kippur is a time to reflect on dharma and to re-commit to the the
callings to be in right relationship with everything.
It is also a time, from one year to the next, that people grieve their
loved ones who have departed from this earthly life. There is a
memorial service in which the Mourner's prayer is recited, the Kaddish.
Names of family member's who have died in this past year's time are
called out loud for the congregation to mourn together. Sometimes the
names of relatives who died in the Holocaust are also called out loud.
As I listened to each name, I visualized the life of each person -- with
their passions, their homes and families, with their work and tears and
laughter. Lives ~~ just like each one of us is having a life. I look
around the Congregation and reflect on how one day each of us will have
our name called out. Similar to at a funeral, knowing that each person
attending is destined for our own funeral service.
Am I the only one who thinks that? I doubt it.
Because we all know the fact of our impermanence.
This year the absence of my brother-in-law, Michael, was so loud in
every one''s heart that knew him. He loved going to temple and didn't
miss any of the day's services, as so many of us do. He loved to usher
and he took it all very seriously. He was known and loved by so many
people in the Congregation. I reflected on last year's services and I
know that I (nor anyone) would have ever guessed that he wouldn't be
here for this year's holy days. My sister has spend more than forty
years of attending services with him by her side. The Jewish holidays
somehow makes the losses seem even more real.
And, simultaneously, beginning a new year fresh gives a glimpse of hope
for new seeds of life to grow and the possibilities for new chapters to
take place for those who remain embodied.
We truly don't know when our time is up or the leaving time of the beings we love. Certainly, I say nothing new!
With all my heart, with every cell of me, I call out to myself and
every human being I know, each one of you who is reading this, lets not
waste a moment! Let's love each other with everything we've got! Let's love our lives as they are right now, no matter what is going on.
Let's spend time each day, or at least each week, to reflect, to have a
mini "Yum Kippur time" so to be in "right" (dharmic) relationship with
everything and everyone... and lets be shameless when we need help with
re-aligning ourselves. It is no easy task to live well, love well and
be present to all that needs to be addressed -- from our bills and
upkeep, to our loved ones, to our own health needs, to the world at
large that is hurting and calling for us to know that we are all
interconnected with one another.
I think that is why holy days like Yom Kippur are created. We are not
expected to be perfect. We need times of purification, atonement, and
forgiveness. We all deserve compassion and support. We are all finding
our way, lost and found.
My beloved Tony wrote this beautimus song called Lost & Found that comes to mind to share~
Lost & Found:
you’re livin’ a lie and you’re livin’ it all over you’re not livin’ your life you’re just running for cover
now
as the clock spins around and the people in town well, they’ll hardly hear a sound as you quietly go down searching for happiness that you can weigh in by the pound while you’re just aching to give
and you’re dying to live
for something you can truly call profound
so now as the Ever Silent Circle comes around just know that some things must be lost before they’re found lost before they’re found so lift your head up now and try not to look down
take a look inside and all around now set your feet back on the ground
‘cause you’re not only lost, you’re also found you’re also found you’re also found.
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